Southern Thing Column

If swimsuit sizes were Southern

Below is an excerpt from a column published on It’s a Southern Thing. To read it in its entirety, click here.

When we were looking for an adult-kiddie pool for the yard of our new house, Sweetums and I were surprised to learn there has been a run on above-ground swimming pools this year. It seems more people had decided to swim at home because of the COVID-19 pandemic.

I was about to panic when we found one. A swimming pool has become an important part of my summer routine in the past several years – it turns out, once you turn 50, your core body temperature increases by about 110 degrees per year. That continues until you hit your 70s or 80s, when it begins to fall so fast you could wear three or four sweaters on the beach in August and still feel cold.

According to scientific research, by which I mean perusing Facebook posts, many women my age like nothing better than to spend entire days in their backyard pools, navigating the world and maintaining the household from atop a donut-shaped float (one equipped with a cup holder for the requisite adult sippy cup).

With so many people swimming at home this summer, many middle-aged women will also discover how freeing it is to swim in whatever attire they want – swim skirts, over-sized T-shirts, long-johns – without fear of judgment. We may be all about positive body image these days but those of us raised in the “Charlie’s Angels” era of the feminist movement still have some lingering issues, by which I mean we struggle with the fact that our thighs won’t practice social distancing.

Click here to continue reading this column on It’s a Southern Thing.

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