Southern Thing Column

How to think like a cat

Following is an excerpt from this week’s column on The link at the bottom takes you to the full column.

[By Kelly Kazek] Sweetums has an issue with cats, y’all, by which I mean where I see adorable wide-eyed pets who make our nest less empty, he sees Satan’s spawn. Whenever I baby talk the widdle kitties and murmur how much their momsy-womsy loves them, Sweetums likes to tell me: “You know if you died and no one found your body for a few days, they’d eat you, right? Even your face.”

He has gone so far as to laugh when he spotted me standing beneath our loft holding a pillow as Charley perched precariously on the one-inch-wide railing.

“You know they land on their feet, right?” he says.

That Sweetums is such a sentimentalist.

And then there are the cute little nicknames he has for my kitties: “white cat” and (whisper) the a-word. They’re terms of endearment, like when I call him Sweetums. Or Nummy Buns. Only different.

He’ll never convince me my little fur-sweetumses don’t love me … mainly because I think like a cat. And here’s how … click this link to read the full column on

2 thoughts on “How to think like a cat”

  1. I’m lucky, my husband loves cats too. We have two and while one is your typical cat, has stereotypical cat behavior, the other is the biggest love bug in the world. He’s not happy without his daily sitting on my lap/nestle on my shoulder at the dinner table (he really cuddles) or sitting on my lap when I watch TV. I had to draw the line at him sleeping on my bed, because I have to get up at 5 AM on workdays, and I can’t afford to have him wake me up. Hubby got exiled for the same reason.
    I realize that this is not typical cat behavior. He’s the most affectionate cat I’ve ever met, or that I’m likely to meet. He was just born this way, Sometimes I’ve wondered if he’s really a human in disguise.


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