Column

Do women really need dangly crotch jewelry to draw attention (whisper) down there?

[Kelly Kazek] In a world in which really stupid people strive for attention with selfies and TMI disclosures, there are still some things we humans ought not draw attention to, and tops on the list is our (whisper) private parts.

NOTE: This is today’s column for AL.com. A link at the bottom takes you to the full column.

As I’ve said many times and still plan to embroider on a throw pillow: “They’re called privates for a reason.” Words to live by, as anyone raised in the south knows. If you ever need a reminder, just call me … or your mother.

This throw-pillow philosophy came to mind in past years when trends have arisen to make a woman’s (whisper) hooha more conspicuous. “Decorative” bikini waxes, for instance, or vajazzling, which involves putting sparkly crystals where sparkly crystals ought not be.

I found these trends pointless not only because I am a southern lady but also because I never understood why women would need to entice people to notice their (whisper) nether regions by adding bling, effectively creating a lighted marquee announcing “Here it is. C’mon in” … But now BoDivas Original Jewelry has created a piece of body bling called a Beachtail that I can only describe as … alarming. It is described as a “sexy charm for the bikini crotch.”  Click here to continue reading on AL.com.

beach tails 1

2 thoughts on “Do women really need dangly crotch jewelry to draw attention (whisper) down there?”

  1. Just one correction to your article.  Women do not have “dangly bits” as you mentioned.  Dangly bits are male.  “Wobbly bits” are female and refer to both her nether region and her chest protuberances.  “Naughty bits” are both collective and gender neutral.

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